[By the time Itachi has finished speaking, Wei Wuxian's eyes are wet. He doesn't bother to wipe the tears way, letting them fall softly to the pillow beneath his cheek as a smile blooms across his face. It is so much better than the way Itachi's life had ended before.
He knows why he hadn't wanted Sasuke to know of his ruse, but it's relief he feels at the knowledge that the secret hadn't died with him. Maybe Itachi wasn't ready for the world to know his heart, Wei Wuxian understands why. Still, he's glad his brother found out the truth. (Even if he knows it's a sentiment he can't examine too closely for fear of opening one of his own wounds.)]
I'm glad you got to speak to Sasuke. [He breathes out quietly. Uchiha Itachi, still helping his brother and his village even after death. It's isn't surprising, but sometimes it still takes his legs out from under him just how good Itachi is. How full of love for his brother and loyalty to his village.
He loves him so much, his heart feels full enough to burst.]
（ he pushes himself up on one arm, and leans over to dab at those tears, thumbing them away with a whisper-soft touch. the press of his lips follows against one cheek. ）
You would love him, but those feelings would not be returned. He would think very poorly of you, and all the moreso for the fact you have stolen my attention. He never did quite master the art of sharing his elder brother. It was just the same with Shisui.
[He has a moment to smile softly and close his eyes at the press of lips to his cheek, and then he's raising a hand to cover his mouth as he bursts into quiet laughter at Itachi's direct assessment of his brother.]
Aiya, I think I'd love him all the more for it! [And perhaps tease him a little for it too.] I bet I could win him over eventually though. I'm vey persistent. [He winks and then reaches for one of Itachi's hands, grasping it in his own.]
I think I already love him a little [he admits, squeezing his hand]
（ he lets the man take his hand, and then uses it as a fulcrum by which to tug him across the bed and — neatly — half across his chest so they are splayed in a messy tangled x of limbs. ）
I believe he would be much harder to win over than I have been. You would have your work cut out for you.
[He is sentimental, but he doesn't have to go around saying it out loud like that! He laughs and allows himself to be tugged over, grinning and settling comfortably against Itachi's chest. He ducks to press a playful kiss to the underside of his jaw before meeting his eyes again.]
Mmm, I believe you. I think he'd be worth putting in the work though. He's your brother. [He pauses before adding] And I have at least a little experience with grumpy younger brother wrangling. [He winks. In truth he knows that if Sasuke were to ever appear on the station, the challenges he'd encounter trying to befriend him would be wildly different from the challenged he faced with Jiang Cheng, but it's still funny alright.]
（ not to, you know, kill the vibe, but as wei ying settles against him and itachi lifts a hand instinctually to card his hair — ）
Sasuke is still a kindhearted boy beneath the damage I did to him. You would be good for him. But I cannot say that I am displeased he has never come to the Ximilia.
[He hums softly in agreement. Whether it's because of what Sasuke's appearance would mean for Itachi or because his appearance here would indicate the desire to change a significant part of his life, he can understand the sentiment.]
It gets complicated and difficult, having people here from home. I understand. I've thought occasionally on what it would be like if Jiang Cheng was here and.. [He cringes.] His feelings would be understandable but disruptive to the mission, and it would be hard for him here.
（ that cringe is soothed away with a touch to his shoulder, bracing and calm. long fingers slip against the jutting wing of his collarbone, and his thumb presses into the anchoring muscle below. ）
I met her, you know. Your sister, in her time here.
（ but he has never brought it up before, and wei ying has never asked. he must have known the possibility existed that they had crossed paths. itachi predated him aboard the ximilia by some months, after all. but it is a difficult thing to say, i saw your sister's death. ）
[Instead of landing as a blow as he might have expected the words to land, Wei Wuxian finds himself inexplicably emotional at the thought. It passes after a moment and he gets control of himself, but the lingering emotion remains. The smile he levels Itachi with is a fragile thing, wonder, pain, and happiness all at once.]
I'd hoped you might have. [Because Itachi is right, it had crossed his mind. He wonders what Shijie had thought of him. She would have liked him, he thinks.] What was it like?
（ she was very nearly one of the first people he spoke to here. the situation may have been fraught, but there was something in her grace and gentleness and her concern, amidst everything, for him that had struck him as strange even then.
his gaze goes unfocused in memory. his hand stills against his friend's shoulder. ）
She was very kind. It... I was not accustomed to such things, then. I confess, I was suspicious of her motivations in being so.
[It makes his smile soften further to imagine it and he lets out a quiet huff of a laugh as he reaches out to catch one of Itachi's hands in his own.]
If she picked up on it, she wouldn't have minded it. It only would have made her consider that it was something you needed to experience more of. If she'd been here longer, I suspect she would have ended up cooking for you eventually. [He grows quiet for a while before he speaks again.]
She would have loved you if she'd remained. All she would have needed to see was that you made me happy. [It was all that would have mattered to her.]
（ being responsible of someone's happiness will never cease to alarm him. there is a weight to it, something that settles across his shoulders. but rather than feel like a burden, it's almost bolstering. his expression flickers to something imperceptible and then settles somewhere around fond. ）
I'm glad that I do.
（ in his darker moments, it's not necessarily something he can stand. but right now — it's enough. ）
[There's not much he feels inclined to say to that, so instead he leans forward and draws Itachi into a soft lingering kiss that better expresses what he's feeling.
When he eventually pulls away it's with a soft sigh of fond longing.]
Did you get a chance to see everyone you needed to see?
[Am I keeping you from the things you need to do? He doesn't ask.]
[A knowing understanding crosses his expression—he must have already discovered McCoy's absence then—but the feeling doesn't linger. As much as McCoy's absence hurts and will continue to ache for some time, right now the relief at Itachi's return is more powerful, and he won't turn away from it.
After a moment of contemplative silence, he speaks again, voice soft]
I would have been okay eventually. I wouldn't have let it consume me. I know it isn't what you'd want for me. [It would have been difficult and painful, but he would have made it out, he thinks. He isn't the same man that first arrived on the Ximilia. It feels important that Itachi knows this.]
But your place in my heart and in my soul would have remained unchanged for the rest of my days. [And this too, feels important to say.]
（ the words soothe something he had not yet examined well enough to name. his eyes flicker closed, veiling his sight, and he breathes out steady and slow.
then: ）
Thank you.
（ wei ying would survive.
sasuke will, too. ）
The nature of this place, when we return to our worlds... I did not recall you there. But you, too, were written in my soul. And returning here, and your side, is as much a homecoming as to Konoha.
[That elicits an involuntary sound from the back of his throat and he leans forward, clasping Itachi's fingers tightly in his own.
Homecoming. The same as Itachi's return had felt for him.
He had thought once that Lotus Pier was his home, but he finds now it isn't the halls he skipped as a child or the water of the lakes that he misses, as much loved as those placed were. It is his brother and his sister, his uncle, his shidis and shimei, and even Madam Yu. His home has always been people and his home has a new face now.
But he has never been claimed as home to someone else and his whole body aches with it.
He reaches up to hold Itachi's face between his hands and inhales tremulously.]
（ he can't help it. the word, singular as it may be, earns a soft laugh. itachi leans in, and kisses the bridge of his nose in a way that's almost playful. or, as playful as he ever is. ）
You're not the only one who does independent research [he quips back, clearly pleased with himself, and nosing forward to trail kisses along Itachi's jawline.
Between kisses, he manages] You're not getting your blanket back. It lives here now.
（ the laugh that follows is almost helpless, muffled as he turns against the man's bare shoulder. ）
Keep it.
（ it's said softly. thoughtfully. ）
Perhaps its captivity will impel me to spend more time here as well.
（ he isn't interested in giving up his space. he prefers his privacy too much, and wei ying's room is... loud. in both demeanor and decoration. nor would he expect the man could leave these quarters that have preserved gwen's memory so perfectly. but... timeshare he can do. that is simple enough. ）
It better. [He knows the smile on his face entirely undercuts the feigned threat, but he can't help it. Less than twenty-four hours ago, he'd felt like his world had caved in, and now his heart is full. Maybe even fuller than it was before Itachi left.
Itachi's laughter rings in his ears and Wei Wuxian's heart stutters in his chest, caught on the carefree sound.
It was worth every moment of sorrow to hear it now.
For a long while, he remains on Itachi's chest, alternating between sweet mumbled conversation and stretches of companionable silence that grow longer with every pass. As it turns out, he hadn't slept enough to make up for his lack, and eventually he drifts off right where he is with the steady rhythm of Itachi's breathing lulling him into the deep.]
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He knows why he hadn't wanted Sasuke to know of his ruse, but it's relief he feels at the knowledge that the secret hadn't died with him. Maybe Itachi wasn't ready for the world to know his heart, Wei Wuxian understands why. Still, he's glad his brother found out the truth. (Even if he knows it's a sentiment he can't examine too closely for fear of opening one of his own wounds.)]
I'm glad you got to speak to Sasuke. [He breathes out quietly. Uchiha Itachi, still helping his brother and his village even after death. It's isn't surprising, but sometimes it still takes his legs out from under him just how good Itachi is. How full of love for his brother and loyalty to his village.
He loves him so much, his heart feels full enough to burst.]
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（ he pushes himself up on one arm, and leans over to dab at those tears, thumbing them away with a whisper-soft touch. the press of his lips follows against one cheek. ）
You would love him, but those feelings would not be returned. He would think very poorly of you, and all the moreso for the fact you have stolen my attention. He never did quite master the art of sharing his elder brother. It was just the same with Shisui.
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Aiya, I think I'd love him all the more for it! [And perhaps tease him a little for it too.] I bet I could win him over eventually though. I'm vey persistent. [He winks and then reaches for one of Itachi's hands, grasping it in his own.]
I think I already love him a little [he admits, squeezing his hand]
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（ he lets the man take his hand, and then uses it as a fulcrum by which to tug him across the bed and — neatly — half across his chest so they are splayed in a messy tangled x of limbs. ）
I believe he would be much harder to win over than I have been. You would have your work cut out for you.
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Mmm, I believe you. I think he'd be worth putting in the work though. He's your brother. [He pauses before adding] And I have at least a little experience with grumpy younger brother wrangling. [He winks. In truth he knows that if Sasuke were to ever appear on the station, the challenges he'd encounter trying to befriend him would be wildly different from the challenged he faced with Jiang Cheng, but it's still funny alright.]
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Sasuke is still a kindhearted boy beneath the damage I did to him. You would be good for him. But I cannot say that I am displeased he has never come to the Ximilia.
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It gets complicated and difficult, having people here from home. I understand. I've thought occasionally on what it would be like if Jiang Cheng was here and.. [He cringes.] His feelings would be understandable but disruptive to the mission, and it would be hard for him here.
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I met her, you know. Your sister, in her time here.
（ but he has never brought it up before, and wei ying has never asked. he must have known the possibility existed that they had crossed paths. itachi predated him aboard the ximilia by some months, after all. but it is a difficult thing to say, i saw your sister's death. ）
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I'd hoped you might have. [Because Itachi is right, it had crossed his mind. He wonders what Shijie had thought of him. She would have liked him, he thinks.] What was it like?
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his gaze goes unfocused in memory. his hand stills against his friend's shoulder. ）
She was very kind. It... I was not accustomed to such things, then. I confess, I was suspicious of her motivations in being so.
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If she picked up on it, she wouldn't have minded it. It only would have made her consider that it was something you needed to experience more of. If she'd been here longer, I suspect she would have ended up cooking for you eventually. [He grows quiet for a while before he speaks again.]
She would have loved you if she'd remained. All she would have needed to see was that you made me happy. [It was all that would have mattered to her.]
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I'm glad that I do.
（ in his darker moments, it's not necessarily something he can stand. but right now — it's enough. ）
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When he eventually pulls away it's with a soft sigh of fond longing.]
Did you get a chance to see everyone you needed to see?
[Am I keeping you from the things you need to do? He doesn't ask.]
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（ he holds no delusions about the others. few care about him the way that wei ying and yennefer do, and mccoy is — mm. ）
Presently, I would prefer to stay with you.
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After a moment of contemplative silence, he speaks again, voice soft]
I would have been okay eventually. I wouldn't have let it consume me. I know it isn't what you'd want for me. [It would have been difficult and painful, but he would have made it out, he thinks. He isn't the same man that first arrived on the Ximilia. It feels important that Itachi knows this.]
But your place in my heart and in my soul would have remained unchanged for the rest of my days. [And this too, feels important to say.]
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then: ）
Thank you.
（ wei ying would survive.
sasuke will, too. ）
The nature of this place, when we return to our worlds... I did not recall you there. But you, too, were written in my soul. And returning here, and your side, is as much a homecoming as to Konoha.
no subject
Homecoming. The same as Itachi's return had felt for him.
He had thought once that Lotus Pier was his home, but he finds now it isn't the halls he skipped as a child or the water of the lakes that he misses, as much loved as those placed were. It is his brother and his sister, his uncle, his shidis and shimei, and even Madam Yu. His home has always been people and his home has a new face now.
But he has never been claimed as home to someone else and his whole body aches with it.
He reaches up to hold Itachi's face between his hands and inhales tremulously.]
お帰り.
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That was not one I taught you.
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Between kisses, he manages] You're not getting your blanket back. It lives here now.
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Keep it.
（ it's said softly. thoughtfully. ）
Perhaps its captivity will impel me to spend more time here as well.
（ he isn't interested in giving up his space. he prefers his privacy too much, and wei ying's room is... loud. in both demeanor and decoration. nor would he expect the man could leave these quarters that have preserved gwen's memory so perfectly. but... timeshare he can do. that is simple enough. ）
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Itachi's laughter rings in his ears and Wei Wuxian's heart stutters in his chest, caught on the carefree sound.
It was worth every moment of sorrow to hear it now.
For a long while, he remains on Itachi's chest, alternating between sweet mumbled conversation and stretches of companionable silence that grow longer with every pass. As it turns out, he hadn't slept enough to make up for his lack, and eventually he drifts off right where he is with the steady rhythm of Itachi's breathing lulling him into the deep.]